Sarah Says...

Create Something - But What?

2011-04-08T20:58:00.003-04:00

For a long time I have felt deep within that I should be creating something. But I never knew what. Like there was a story somewhere deep inside waiting for me to find it and free it.

I still feel that way and I still don't know what that story is or how to get it out.

One of my earliest creative memories was from elementary school. I wrote a short story and illustrated it. I believe it was about Halloween, it had a black construction paper cover. I know I did well and it was ready to a larger group at school.

I bring this up because this I seem to find ways to do assignments (school or work) but when it comes to my personal writing I'll start something and then find out it's not what I thought and toss it to the side. And then something else will come up and I'll do the same.

How do I get my stories out? I don't even know where to start. Do I just keep writing hoping one of them will be the one? I honestly don't know how to move forward.

Anyone else have this feeling/problem? How do I create when I don't know what I'm supposed to be creating?

Be Still

2011-03-20T22:41:00.002-04:00

I find myself running from one activity to the next all the time. From work, church meetings, family and friends to household duties. There seems to be rare occasion when I am still. Without the TV or computer occupying me or my nose deep in a book or other item. To just sit back and enjoy the beauty of this world. To listen and to take in the many smells. Empty you mind from all the worries that occupy us most of the time.

So I'm off to enjoy the sights and sounds of this lovely Spring night in central Florida. The balmy breeze and a bright moon.

Wonderful.

Now I Get to Complain a Little

2011-03-19T14:35:00.002-04:00

There's so much to do but I don't know how.

That seems to be the theme of my life. Things haven't gone the way I would have planned as I was preparing to get married 10 years ago. I don't have the children I hoped for. We aren't any where near being financially secure. The house is in dire need of repairs we can't afford and I am making less than I was 2 years ago.

I look around and there's so much to do but I don't know how to fix any of it. With the job market in the toilet here in Central Florida I'm ecstatic I have a job let alone one that pays better. The same goes for my hubby. While he's succeeding more at poker, he hasn't had the break-through yet that would help us. So the houses problems wait. The roof, the cracking exterior, the peeling paint, the kitchen, bathrooms, the back yard full of weeds rather than plants - it stays.

And when you reach my age you should be getting fertility treatments - but there's no funds for that. And what money is there to adopt, as if an agency would approve us.

Frustration. Most of my friends have their families complete, they are on the rise financially. Doing projects, going on trips.

I know this is a lot of bitching and I really do have plenty to be greatful for. I have a loving husband. A great family and some great friends. I am employed. And I have taken leadership roles within my church that has helped me connect with others and given me lots to do. I do have a home, food to eat and other creature comforts that makes me look rich compared to many around the world.

But there are those nagging thoughts in my brain. When are things going to work out? So I can stop spending my Saturdays puttering around my house alone because there's no money to do projects and I don't want to use expensive gas to get out. Will I ever have children? Or will be I that old lady doating on everyone elses kids?

So much to do and I still don't know how.

Audacious Dreams - I'm All In

2011-03-13T20:42:00.004-04:00

Once again I was reading a book, this one by Trent Hamm, the blogger of the Simple Dollar. He wrote that when you dream you should dream audaciously. Audacious is defined as being bold, brave and without fear. To go all the way in your dreams and desires. Or in poker terms, go all in.

This struck a cord with me. I often read that you should structure your dreams into smaller portions so they are more realisitic. But having big dreams and taking big risks can pay off. You can also fail big. And that's OK because at least you tried.

So now I need a list of these audacious dreams and figure out how to reach them. Living so safe isn't the way of my life anymore.

Habit Forming

2011-03-11T21:05:00.004-05:00

On the urging of my boss, I started reading Twyla Tharp's book The Creative Habit. I've only read 2 chapters but I've already been reminded that in order to be good at what you love to do you must practice. You must make a habit out of it.

So I must write more. Much more.

I need to write about everything and anything I can. Daily preferably.

So back I come to my old friend, Sarah Says.... I've had this blog since 2004. I come and go. But I must bd more consistent. I must work harder at my craft.
I'm in. I can't wait to read more of Twyla's book.

Are you ready? I am.

No cable? No Problem.

2010-07-29T22:04:00.002-04:00

This past spring hubby and I gave up our cable. We now use one of those digital converter boxes and antennas. I thought I'd have nothing to watch. Actually, I think we've watched more quality programming than before. PBS (there are now five of them we can watch - there is seven actually but one is in Spanish and one is the state Legislative channel) has become a mainstay. Between all the concerts, travel, cooking, gardening, home improvement, nature and documentaries we are covered. There are even two 24-hour weather channels.

There's only one show I miss, watching the Rays on TV. But, there's always the radio. What it comes down to is that when we had a hundred channels there were many times when there was nothing on. So now I don't feel bad when there is nothing on as it costs me nothing. Bonus? I'm reading more often.

Analyze This!

2010-07-23T16:52:00.005-04:00

I been spending lots of time learning the ins and outs of SEO (Search Engine Optimization) and SMO (Social Media Optimization) as we delve into Web 2.0 at work.

It's been fun. It also reminded me how much fun over the years I've had with my blog. When I started this thing back in July 2003 I never imagined I'd be here still writing on it. Heck - who knew if blogs would still exist in 2010. Change is constant on the social web.

This blog has been a place I've shared by joys and sorrows as well as many of my hopes and dreams. It has allowed me to be creative when my job didn't offer much of it. And to stay in touch with friends and family.

So now I'm back looking how to increase my traffic and spread the gospel of social media. Ok, not really. There are plenty of people out there talking about social media. I still want to talk about myself and what I am thinking about.

Now if I can get my Google account to stop acting like a teenager, shutting the door to my account when I want to use it. Some things in life are harder than others.

I'm Mad. Pissed off.

2010-06-24T21:52:00.005-04:00

It's been tough reading and seeing the video and pictures of the oil washing up on the beautiful beaches of the panhandle of Florida.

These were pristine areas.

Here in Florida we didn't agree to have drilling off the coast for this reason. So much we have here is based on tourism. People coming here taking vacations to see our beautiful coasts and waters. Swim, fish, enjoy the beauty.

I'm really worried we have managed to ruin miles and miles of lovely coast. Along with all of the animals that are gone. I saw tonight we might lose blue fin tuna because of this spill. Did you know 3 out of 5 sea turtle species are found in the Gulf of Mexico? They are dying quickly.

For you who are in different parts of the country or world you too should be mad. We, the American people, have caused this with our desires for more and more oil rather than using less and demanding the use of technologies that can move us towards less and less oil dependence. Drill baby drill? Really?

I'm mad. I am pissed off. This is my home and I can't believe some foreign company could be so careless with people's livelihoods and our environment which is so precious.

Bon Appetit!

2010-04-10T18:23:00.003-04:00

I finished reading Appetite for Life, The Biography of Julia Child by Noel Riley Fitch. What a fantastically interesting woman Julia was. The public persona we think of with her teaching french dishes on PBS to the masses was only a part of her. In fact, she didn't get famous until she was about 50. I loved reading about her marriage to Paul Child. They loved each other tremendously and made each other successful. When he died in the book, I was very sad as I could only image how she must have felt.

I empathized with her as she was never able to have children and that would be her only regret at the end of her life. I wonder if I could move on with life and grab it by the horns as she was able to - to find so many ways that brought her joy and meaning.

Her young adult life in the service to this country was so fascinating. As this book was published before the government released that she was a spy it was more exciting.

The book was dry at times and there is a LOT of french food not defined but the story was compelling and I have a new appreciation for a woman that was often parodied as a smart, hard-working, joyous woman who revolutionized food television and the cookbook industry.

Disappointment

2010-03-25T19:20:00.002-04:00

I'm very upset. Reading about how the Pope might have known and chosen NOT do anything about pedophile priests years ago. There is no excuse that anyone would turn their back on children being hurt in such terrible ways. If this is true I think he should step down.

This type of thing is really getting out of control and all the Church can do to move forward is to institute a policy that anyone involved in or sanctioning anyone involved with, should be removed from pastoral care immediately. I don't care who you are.

Sad. So sad. It's time we gain the trust of those within our own flocks by saying this is not acceptable. It is acceptable.

What I learned...

2010-02-03T18:43:00.003-05:00

I was unemployed for more than six months in the past year. I saw more episodes of TV shows than I care to admit. I stayed in my PJ's many a day. I wrote and sent probably 100 resumes and cover letters - maybe more! I cried, I yelled, I was depressed. Now that I've got a new job to start I've reflected on the past year.

Losing your job once, let alone two times in one year is a blow to ones ego. I had thought I was important to my work places. Nah. They moved on without me.

So here are some of what I've learned in the past year:

1. Nothing stays the same. Flexibility is important to survive these tough times. It will serve you well in life.
2. It isn't personal, but it is. Most likely it was a financial decision that caused me to lose my job and many others who are in the same boat. But at the same time, it is deeply personal to the person it is effecting. For those who know the unemployed, understand that. They most likely are mad, sad, pissed, mortified, devastated. You can't know until it happens to you.
3. It's OK to ask for help. It's hard to get a job. Especially now. You need to tell everyone you know you are out of work. Asking others for help getting the work out, passing along your resume, looking at your resume, giving a reference or just listening to you.
4. Be good to yourself. Eat well, exercise, go to local parks, visit friends and family, read those books you've been meaning to and anything else that can bring you joy. There are so many things you can do for little or no money, look for them! Being happier will make you a better job candidate.

Park Tour 2010

2010-01-21T12:48:00.004-05:00

The cold weather has left Florida with many brown/dead plants. But the warm weather has returned and the outdoors called to me when I suggested to my sister Laura we spend the afternoon in a local park.

We decided on Philippe Park in Safety Harbor. It's the oldest park in the county that is situated on the northwest coast of Tampa Bay. It has a little bit of everything: beaches, extensive tree canopy, mangroves, historic landmarks, wildlife and stunning views of the bay.
View from south boardwalk across bay - Photo: Laura Knupke-Coe

View along beach - Photo: Laura Knupke-Coe

We learned that the park's namesake, Odette Philippe, had a plantation there. He also introduced grapefruit and cigars to the area. We also learned there were native Americans living there, the Tocobaggas. There is a large Indian mound at the park that has wonderful views.

What makes this park different is the beach accesses at the south end of the park. Where a car, sometimes two, can park and a short walk through the parted mangroves you find quiet beaches.

My sister noted so many people spend so much time trying to explore the world so few take the time to explore the cool areas around where they live. I agreed. Here in central Florida there are so many beautiful natural areas and this one was 15 minutes from my house. Good reminder that with very little money and with a little free time, you can have a really great afternoon.

From Our Home to Yours - Merry Christmas!

2009-12-25T12:23:00.002-05:00

Merry Christmas!
I can't believe another Christmas is upon us. It just seemed like yesterday we were ringing in 2009.
This hasn't been the easiest year for me. But losing two jobs has really helped me reconnect with myself and to figure out who I want to be. How I want to spend my time. It reminded me work is just that, work, not life, not defining who I am. It has also helped my husband and I realize how precious your health is and not to squander it. We have rededicated ourselves to taking care of ourselves. He'll be running a marathon before you know it!

So in the end, 2009 has been a blessing. We are focused and happy.
So as we celebrate this special day we wish you peace and happiness and blessings for 2010.

Hallomas - Wha?

2009-11-17T22:39:00.004-05:00

I love the holidays. There, I said it. I love Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years. I love the smells, the lights, the Christmas trees, presents under the tree, Midnight Mass, singing the songs and counting down to midnight of a New Year.

What I don't like is the blurring of the holiday lines. That the holidays have been corrupted by retailers and them deciding when the Christmas season begins - the day after Halloween I believe it seems to be. That a time for family and friends is now a time for spending money.

I want to be able to enjoy Thanksgiving. A day to spend with my family where I can be reminded of all I have been given and how thankful I need and should be. And then enjoy advent - the period leading up the Christmas. Then Christmas Eve and then Christmas. And in my faith, Christmas doesn't end on Dec. 26 but continues into January. And then it's New Years Eve and New Years. Each day is special in itself.

And that's what I think is a serious problem how we as people seem to wish away days. I can't wait until this or that. When the kid can walk or talk, when they are in kindergarten, when I lose weight, when I get a promotion, when I get a job, when I get married...etc. We need to enjoy each day as you don't get to do it twice. And by starting Christmas at Halloween I think it's a form of wishing days away.

So folks, enjoy each day. Don't wish it away. Every day is special. You can never get it back.

One Step Forward

2009-11-08T18:05:00.004-05:00

Americans don't like to wait - for anything. We love fast food, fast cars, express lanes, 10-minute hair color, instant-read thermometers, quick oil changes and instant mash potatoes. This is also true when it comes to making changes in our lives. We want immediate results.
I've struggled with my weight for years. I don't think I was ever a skinny person. Always what one could call plump and increasing to obese in my adult years. It look me a while to get to where I was. I know that it will take a while to get to a more normal size.
I'm being realistic.
I am re-learning about eating and changing my relationship with it. Learning that exercise can be fun and rewarding and how to integrate moving more throughout my day. Whether it is gardening, cleaning house, taking a walk during my lunch hour, or even dancing around the house while listening to music.
I'm down from my all-time high 46 1/2 pounds and then I stagnated for a year. Now I've renewed my commitment.
I know I won't be skinny in 2 months, but I am working to make sure I am smaller than I am now. And most important that I won't gain it back - ever. By eating whole foods, prepared in delicious and healthy ways and moving more. Really it is simple. It's me making a choice and sticking with it.

Ups and Downs and In Betweens

2009-11-02T17:58:00.003-05:00

2009 hasn't been my best year.
It started well. I had hopes of a promotion, financially we were starting to turn the corner and I was slowly, but consistently losing weight.
All of that changed on February 11 when I was laid-off from my job. I spiraled down into a depression as my unemployment continued into May and then June and into the beginning of July. I didn't know what to do. I finally got a job in July, thank goodness due of the kindness of an old friend who needed help. It's not my dream job, I don't get to write, but it's helping to pay the bills.
You'd think all the extra time I had on my hands I would have had the chance to lose even more weight and get my house in order. None of that happened. I stagnated and my house remained a mess. I'm pretty sure it was denial. It was easier to hide behind my computer and watch afternoon talk shows.
I haven't written on my blog for a long time because I didn't think I had anything to say. Everytime I started, I deleted it because it was consistently depressing and had a whiny tone so I just stopped trying.
Recently I've had an upswing, by my choice. I've accepted a leadership position at church over a new committee. I've started projects around the house and exercise is making a come-back.
I've decided it's time to stop letting my circumstances rule my life and to be thankful for all I do have - A strong and happy marriage,a great family, friends I can count on, a home to come home to, food on my table, my health and a future.
So welcome back to Sarah Says...I have a lot to say.

Trying to Write..

2009-08-29T14:31:00.002-04:00

I'm feeling all out of practice. I haven't written anything outside of cover letters since June. I'm trying to write a simple one-page explainer for the parish council at my church. My lede is great and then it putters out as I continue. Something that should be so simple is proving to be really hard.

I'm worried. Worried that I'm losing what I worked really hard over the past few years to craft to learn. I feel like I'm losing that creative side.

Some may thing I'm being dramatic. I don't. These are valid feelings. I just don't like knowing where or how I'm moving forward in the future. I'm just feel like I'm losing myself little by little.

Saying Goodbye to a Friend

2009-08-23T21:05:00.002-04:00

Today I said goodbye to an old friend. I've know Patti since I was in middle school. She says that she helped me open my locker in gym, I don't remember when we met, only that she was easily my best friend. We spent hours together on the phone, sleeping over at each others homes, talking about crushes, singing, dancing, telling each other our hopes and dreams - everything.

After high school we kinda lost track of each other. We saw each other every now and again. Finally we hooked up again and I met the woman she fell in love with.

Now she is moving out west with her wife and I have to say I'm sad. This is the person I grew up with. Whom I shared so many memories. But she is starting her life anew in a new state and I hope her the best. I also hope that when our finances get back on track we can visit her in Colorado.

So Patti, here's to you and all the great memories. Thank you for being my friend.

Excuses and more excuses

2009-08-05T20:41:00.002-04:00

It's amazing how many excuses a person can come up with not to do something that is difficult. I'm tired, it's too hot outside, I'll look funny, I don't own a sports bra, it will make me uncomfortable and think about bad memories and I can re-start the diet tomorrow.

It seems like that's been my life for the past few years. A bunch of excuses why I hadn't advanced further in my career, why my weight-loss plateaued at 45 pounds,why my garage is still over-flowing with crap, my my closets are overflowing with crap and why I have done nothing to my backyard in five years.

I'm tired of excuses.

I'm tired of people asking me what's new and having very little to report. I'm tired of saying to myself tonight I'm going to..or this weekend I'm going to..and nothing coming of it.

At the end of my life I don't want to be saying if only I had done that. I want to do that. Life is too short. I plan to actually live the one I've got and live it well.

A Great Day for Up

2009-07-10T20:50:00.003-04:00

Last Sunday I saw the movie Up. I haven't been to the theater in a long time and it was a real treat.

It was fantastic. Not a children's movie at all, but for me it hit me in a place deep down. I really think you are exposed to things at specific times for a reason. And it was the right time for me to see this movie.

A couple gets married, enjoys life and gets ready to move onto the next step, children. We find out that children aren't in the cards for them and they continue to move on. A childhood dream of the wife is to visit Paradise Falls, somewhere in South America. Due to circumstances they don't make it. After she dies, the man decides it is his mission to go there to live that dream for them.

The movie is about living your life to the fullest, no matter what life brings you, even if it isn't what you or society believes it should be.

As a women in her mid-30s I can feel that. Children haven't happened for me and my husband and may never. While around me babies are being born left and right to family, friends and acquaintances. This is deeply painful. And with no health insurance at this time and no extra money, infertility treatments and adoption are out of the question. And to hear people ask you when you are having kids or hearing them announce they are pregnant can wound deeply. But you have to smile and move on.

I have started coming to terms with living my life to the fullest with or without children. And I have to stop waiting around and be active in my life to bring more meaning to it in other ways. To figure out what God wants for me. So I've been asked to join the Parish Council at my church, a leadership role, and I've accepted. I'll paint the spare room whatever color I want because pink or blue might not be in the cards. I'll take care of my health because I want to live and live well. I'll spoil the children born around me because it's right. And I'll be sensitive to others who are dreaming of children but haven't achieved it. Because it's a personal thing and no one has the right to make you feel unworthy, less of a woman or a man. And it's not about them, it's about you and your adventures in life.

An Open Letter from Sarah

2009-07-09T17:53:00.002-04:00

Dear Wonderful Readers,
Today I had the chance to visit the St. Petersburg Museum of Art. There was a fantastic Andy Warhol exhibit that really opened my eyes to the artist. I have a new appreciation for his art. Of course there were the wonderful paintings by Monet, Georgia O'Keefe, Renoir, Cezanne..etc.
What really struck me though was the "More Than Words: Illustrated Letters from the Archives of American Art" exhibit. This fantastic exhibit showcased 58 letters from artists. The letters were all illustrated beautifully. I loved the care they took with not only writing letters but also making them beautiful.
Letter writing is a lost art. With blogs, Twitter, Facebook and e-mail it is so easy to send your regards electronically. It is also so easy to hit the delete button.
This made me think about what will people have to look back on for my generation. E-mails with tons of abbreviations, incomplete sentences and stupid forwarded jokes? Tweets? A YouTube video showing someone lip-syncing to a bad song?
There won't be the wonderful love letters stacked and tied lovingly to be re-read on a whim. Or notes from a child home to his/her parents. Letters between best friends sharing confidences.
It makes me sad. I have a box of cards and notes from my husband when we were dating that I want to sit down and go through. It makes me want to write notes to my friends to say hello.
It's amazing how seeing an art exhibit can inspire a person. So words to the wise: Go to an art museum, you'll never know what will inspire you.

Sincerely Yours,
Sarah

Twin Time

2009-06-16T10:56:00.002-04:00

We spent the weekend at my sister and brother-in-law's in Jacksonville. Sister Laura and brother-in-law Greg (they drove actually)also came. We all just felt like we needed a little time away. We sat around the house and hung out, played Wii, watched a bad movie (wrong movie was in our Blockbuster envelope), ate yummy food and of course spent lots of time hugging, kissing and playing with our twin nieces Chloe and Abigail. In the photo above my hubby was happily spending time with them both (Chloe on the left and Abby on the right). What a great way to spend a weekend. We can't wait to see them again, oh, that will be Friday when the Nichols family makes the trip home for Father's Day weekend.

Catching Up on Some American Lit.

2009-06-11T21:57:00.004-04:00

I've taken a break from some serious non-fiction reading and took up two American classics that I can't believe it has taken me this long to get around to reading. First up was Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury. I loved this book. I found it to be very relevant to today, well written and thought-provoking. i loved the editors notes in the back that helped me understand what he meant and that many people have given meanings to the book he never intended. It is about media's effect on society which is so interesting because this is more relevant than ever. I even found an eerie similarity with items in the book with Twitter. Bradbury was ahead of his time.

Next was Mother Night by Kurt Vonnegut. I literally just finished this one and had to turn the computer back on to read what others had to say about it. I liked it, I don't know if I got it in the way many others have, but it was good. I thought it was well-written and I admire Vonnegut's writing style. I didn't find it as funny or biting as many others have but more satirical in many instances. But I was struck by the moral of the story and that he tells you it up-front even though you don't know it at the time: "We are what we pretend to be, so be careful about what we pretend to be." Oh, and "Make love when you can. It's good for you." Both profound yet simple.

Hmm..what's next on the bookshelf? I do need to finish up the Book of Deuteronomy from the Bible and move out of the Pentateuch - the first 5 books of the Old Testament in my quest to read the entire Bible. I will be visiting my sister's this weekend and my brother-in-law usually has lots of good books to borrow. I do have War and Peace...time to break that one out??

A Little Piece of Heaven

2009-05-29T18:16:00.005-04:00

Captain Hubby - Aye Aye Captain!

Mangrove Trees at Caladesi Island

The Blue Wave Beach - Caladesi Island

So Hubby and I decided to take a break from job searching and work today and headed for Caladesi Island off the coast of northern Pinellas County. Rather than take the ferry over, we took our small jon boat.

What a gem of a place! On the ride over you glide over crystal clear blue-green water and head into an opening surrounded by mangrove trees. The narrow slip of land has nature trails (note to self - bring bug repellent next time because the mosquitoes are fierce!) and on the west side, beautiful beaches with white sand and lots of shells. Swimming wasn't for the faint of heart this morning because of strong undercurrents and riptides. Came out unscathed except for a small cut on my toe - luckily I didn't attract any sharks!

It was lovely to be at a beach not built on at all. I just enjoyed sitting on a bench watching the Gulf of Mexico and listening to waves crash and smelling salt in the air. I'd love to return with our canoe and take the kayak trail deep in the mangroves. I'd return any day as it's a piece of unspoiled old Florida.

Auntie By Friendship

2009-05-22T17:44:00.005-04:00

One of my best friends from middle, high school and my college roommate is expecting her first child soon - less than eight weeks. She's been referring to me as Auntie Sarah which is cool. Being an aunt has its perks. And it's cool to see Kathy becoming a mom. I'm looking forward to meeting him or her (they have decided to let the sex be a surprise).

Kathy and Dave have been fantastic. They both have supported me through my unemployed odyssey. She has sent me unexpected notes and little gifts. It's wonderful having support of friends. I hope she knows what a great friend she has been - if not, Kathy - read this now, thank you for everything you have and continue to do. I wish I could be a better auntie to Baby Big, getting you all the cute baby things you deserve. Throwing you a baby shower. But Auntie Sarah will make it up to you some day when I can spoil Baby Big.

Baby Big watch starts now.

Under My Umbrella

2009-05-21T21:49:00.002-04:00

We've had a lot of rain recently which is fantastic actually since central Florida has been in a major drought for more than three years. I got caught in a downpour when I stopped at Publix to pick up a few items.

Behind the drivers seat was my trusty umbrella. I've had it since the Christmas before I graduated high school in 1992. It was a gift from my paternal Grandmother. It was a very nice umbrella. Not like the ones that folds up tiny and easily break. But one that is old-fashioned style, with the curved handle you can place over you arm that is accented with wood on the handle, the end and on the tips. To top it off, the material once was vibrant multi-colored that looked like a jig-saw puzzle.

Who keeps an umbrella for 18 years? And how does this umbrella still work? I should have lost it by now. It was left in a number of places, in the library at USF, restaurants, people's houses, etc. But every time I lost it, I found it.

Today I popped my trusty umbrella open and I noticed one of the wooden tips had slipped off and there was a tiny tear in the material. In the midst of the rainstorm I stopped and stared at it.

Grandma died a few years ago. I have a variety of items that belonged to her, lovely items. But for some reason seeing this umbrella falling apart brought pause to me. Reminded me of what a great lady she was and that I missed her.

I brought the umbrella home and popped the wooden tip back on, I will look for some glue to attach it better. The rip is small and not in the top so it will still keep my dry. So it will go back behind my seat tomorrow to keep me dry another day. I'm not ready to let go of it yet.

No News, Not Good News

2009-05-20T20:45:00.003-04:00

Wow. I can't believe I am still unemployed.

I never thought it would take so long. Thank goodness I have my volunteer work at the church to keep my mind sharp. I have had the opportunity to write a good number of items in the past few months and participated in meetings and even town hall meetings.

I can't believe how some employers are using this opportunity to put potential employees through an awful ringer, making people bow down and kiss their toes and reminding us again and again that you are so lucky they are even spending a moment with you.

I am a fair person. I want to work hard and be paid a fair wage and be treated with a little dignity along the way. Is that a huge order? I don't think so.

Why must the first question be about money? Forcing me to show you my hand, but then refusing - REFUSING - to show me anything of yours. Not letting me tell you that I am more flexible. Not telling you that you DIDN'T get the job after an interview. I'd take a computer generated e-mail.

But at least this time really shows the true nature of a business and helps me to know where to try to get a job in the future.

I'm sure my job is around the corner. I have faith. And I am lucky to have to many great family members and friends who care about me and lift my spirits when I need it.

It's Time...

2009-04-24T11:03:00.002-04:00

I finally finished reading Thomas Friedman's: Hot, Flat, and Crowded. It took me a long time but I am glad I persevered and finished it. I know many people think Friedman is an environmental nut. He may be, but he has some good points.

The main one is this: the energy revolution is the opportunity for America to stand up and be truly innovative and lead the world with new technologies dedicated to new forms of energy that are better for our planet rather than allowing other countries to take that lead. This opportunity can allow us to transform our economy, creating new companies and jobs. Instead we have had our head in the sand and handed hand-over-fist billions of dollars to foreign countries, many who hate us, and allowed them to be successful off our backs. And whether or not you believe in global warming, which I am amazed there are those folks out there who think it's great for the planet to burn fossil fuels, (ever been to a coal plant?), how could you not believe we have the opportunity to change our country economically. We aren't in the best place right now are we?

And today, I turned on the radio to hear that Al Gore is saying that the current House bill on global warming is akin to the Marshall Plan and Civil Rights and Glen Beck was throwing a hissy-fit about that. Well guess what Mr. Beck? A plan that in all-encompassing and geared to change the energy landscape of the USA is akin to those things. It would change everything. One day it would give access to electricity to those who don't have it and electricity is necessary for an improved standard of living. And doing it clean is absolutely necessary as the areas of the world this effects have the most people.

So America, when are we pulling our heads out of the sand? We have men and women losing their lives because of oil right now and every time you fill up your big-ass SUV or truck you are paying the people who are killing them. Being all fuzzy and nice with Arbor Day, which is today, and Earth Day is nice but it isn't enough. We need politicians to make tough decisions by passing laws that force the companies who are polluting the planet to change and mandate it's citizens to make new choices. Change is tough and sometimes people have to be forced. It's time...

I want to ride my bicycle...Lessons Learned.

2009-04-17T12:16:00.003-04:00

Yesterday sister Laura and I decided we needed to get out of the house and get some exercise and since she lives really close to the fantastic Pinellas Trail we thought we'd go there. Also, just south of her the trail crosses the intercoastal waterway in Seminole and we have been wanting to cross it. The picture above is on the bridge crossing the water. I guess there could be worse ways to spend the afternoon.

Lesson 1: Remember that if you haven't been on a bicycle for a while, yes your ass WILL hurt.

Lesson 2: Drink enough water and eat something a little more substantial than a granola bar and a banana because add the two deficiences together and you too could faint on the side of Seminole Boulevard (at least it wasn't in the middle of the boulevard!). I am fine by the way, just a sore ass and a couple of scrapes.

Doe a Dear...

2009-04-14T14:28:00.002-04:00

Something about the Sound of Music that gets me every time.

Get By With a Little Help From Your Friends

2009-04-07T19:19:00.001-04:00

I posted this on my career search web site today. I am thankful for my friends and family!

2009-04-01T21:10:00.002-04:00

B.U.E. (Before Unemployment)I had the chance to have a variety of things happen to me and since I was around a variety of people, this upped my chances of interesting interaction. Since U.E. (unemployment) I'm home most of the time and the amount of people I actually talk to on a daily basis is much smaller. So my inspiration for posts seems to have gotten smaller. I don't have a lot to report. I get up, go to mass (guarantees I get out of bed at a good time (7:30 a.m.)and gets me out of the house everyday), come home, exercise (yoga, weights or nothing), eat a bowl of cereal if I didn't get up in time to eat before going to mass, look for a job, have lunch, look for a job, have dinner, look for a job or watch a TV show or read a book and finally go to bed. I think if I didn't use FaceBook, I'd go nuts because I can follow mini conversations throughout the day.

Staying home costs me less money, so that's good, but it always is tedious. But I have to be home to look for a job which I need, badly.

I just wish employers would go back to the whole, we'll let you know that we are no longer considering you instead of postings that scream "NO PHONE CALLS, IF WE THINK YOU ARE WORTHY, WE'LL BE IN TOUCH." OK, I made up the last part, but that's what goes through my head when I see that. Out of all the resumes out, I've only had one response that said thanks, but no thanks. What stung the worst? The job listing went back up.

Enough of my ramblings. I go to the outplacement company on Friday morning and I hope they will help me. I can't handle being by myself so much. I'm ready to work!

The Simple Things

2009-03-24T18:30:00.002-04:00

I have seen some of the news reports that Americans are returning to simple pleasures. Since there are so many uncertainties out there people don't want to spend their money unwisely. What a novel concept, spending time with our families, reading books, seeing movies, simple vacations and starting gardens. It's too bad that it takes a national emergency to get people to do these things - to focus on what is really important.

New Tools

2009-03-18T22:54:00.003-04:00

I read an article about fully using Social Media to gain employment. So off I went to make a web site to showcase myself and I started Twittering (or is it Tweeting?) again. Hey - if if works, I don't care.

So you can catch my new web site "I Want a New Career" - you can find it on the menu on the left and you can find me on Twitter under my name Sarah Varga, you can find me on LinkedIn too. I'm easy to find!

Whew, I've been on the computer a long time today, I keep expecting the laptop to start smokin' soon!

Staying Positive is Hard

2009-03-06T17:34:00.003-05:00

All you hear all day is how bad the economy and how hard it is to find a job. For those of us without a job it makes it even harder to stay positive. Either it's the Dow dropping, huge number of layoffs, dropping home values or another peanut product is being recalled. So with all that is going on how do you stay positive? Believing that you will find a job soon and that you won't be heading towards financial ruin?

I don't know.

Please let me know. I know stressing out doesn't help - but it's hard no to. I think I'm getting gray hair faster recently and that stress could be the culprit.

Who Haven't I Told?

2009-03-04T17:53:00.004-05:00

I'm getting to understand that you need to tell EVERYONE you know that you are unemployed and tell them what kind of job you are looking for. Because you never know who will be talking to a recruiter, business owner or contact who knows about a possible job. Infact, I am thinking about printing resumes for all my family and friends to tote around in case they need to hand it out. (Ok maybe I jest slightly - but only slightly.)

Today my Dad was at a job fair recruiting for workers and he happened to be next to a booth with a recruiter from a large local company. He was kind enough to chat about my and my situation. Next thing I know I have a contact at a company I would love to work for and he has my resume.

So incase you are out and about in the Tampa Bay area and someone is looking for a communications, public relations, marketing, events or project coordinator think about Sarah. I won't pay for the info - but a beer and a hug might be in your future.

Assistance

2009-03-03T13:42:00.003-05:00

Today I called the career assistance service I get as part of my severence. I realize I need help. And if someone else is paying for it why am I not using it? I need them to help me get my resume fit the best. It is hard for me because I want to jump from one role to another and getting potential employers to see my value in a new role isn't easy when they don't know you. I was hoping to make that jump at my old employer.

So I'm waiting to hear back from them after they verify that I was let go and do in fact get the service. So in this case, not using assistance makes an ass just of me.

Top Secret Company

2009-02-26T15:37:00.002-05:00

One thing I am finding that is obnoxious is company's who don't put their names out there when they are advertising for help. I've seen some interesting jobs I might like to apply for, BUT they say the company is confidential. I'm not sure why they do this. I want to know where I applying to. Does this make sense to anyone else? Just say, no phone calls. But I want to know how far away the company is, to see if I would be willing to drive that far or not and to be able to familiarize myself with the company.

Doing my sending resumes dance

2009-02-25T11:14:00.004-05:00

I've had a good friend read over my resume and give me suggestions for improving it. And now I'm ready to pull the trigger. This is a precarious thing. This is now the first chance for me to be either accepted or rejected. I'm trying to prepare myself for what being rejected will feel like. My ego has taken a beating and it's starting to feel somewhat normal at this time. I mean I haven't sat in front of the TV during the day at all this week even though Martha Stewart (don't be haters! she is fun to watch) and Oprah call out of me at 11 and 4 p.m. And my mind is much clearer for what I need to do. Now I just need to do it.

So wish me luck.

Resume Strategery

2009-02-19T21:12:00.004-05:00

I know that I need to make my resume match the job I am applying for. The hard part is that I am looking to change my career away from a support function. I have the experience from within my previous job, but the title just doesn't match. It's all strategery (Saturday Night Live reference). I have been reading up on what I need to do to show that I have experience but that my previous job title might not say that.

I know you only have one time to make an impression so the resume and cover letter are so important. Especially since there are so many people out there looking for jobs.

All I know is I need a job, I can't take being home so much. I'm going nutty. I am keeping the TV on just to hear people talking. It's only been a week. Oye.

Oh Poop

2009-02-18T11:16:00.002-05:00

While taking my 2-mile walk at Lake Seminole Park a bird pooped on me. Yes, I said it, POOPED on me. Now, I really think I have been pooped on enough for the past week. And this is my 1-week anniversary of being unemployed. Not sure if there is any meaning to it being pooped on or if I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.

The First Monday

2009-02-16T21:19:00.002-05:00

The end of last week was like I was on a long weekend. This morning felt very different. I have decided I need to have something every day that forces me to get up and out of bed - besides the fear of running out of money - something that keeps my sanity. So it was off to daily mass and then to a walk in the park for exercise and then home to the job search.

It is so quiet at home and the cat isn't great for conversation. I think just the loneliness might push me.

Anyhow. On to Tuesday.

Day One

2009-02-12T20:41:00.003-05:00

Wow. Thanks to all my family and friends for their support, kind words and offers of help. I can't thank you enough. Today I am processing. So there wasn't a ton of action. I got signed up for unemployment (you can do it on-line did you know that?) went grocery shopping and have spent the last 3 1/2 hours taking traffic school on-line. I am waiting for this current section's time to run out before moving on to the last section and then the final exam.

Not a ton, but something. Tomorrow I hope to read my termination paperwork and call work with any questions. And I have to rework my resume. I submitted one in haste yesterday out of desperation and I'm sure it's not up to snuff. But thanks to some good friends I have folks who will give me pointers.

I do have to say, it is weird waking up on a Thursday and having no workplace to go to. No real purpose. I know, finding a job, has now become my job. And I think I have to continue to write here. It is a release and it keeps me writing. It's easy to get real rusty, real fast.

Whew...well, time's almost up on the other web page I have up so I better finish this darn class up. I can't come back tomorrow and expect that I will remember all the stuff I have crammed in my head. Right now, my brain is on the mushy side as it is.

Unemployment Reality

2009-02-11T19:00:00.002-05:00

Wow. I can't believe I am typing these words. I lost my job today. I was laid off from Progress Energy due to budgetary reasons. I am am in shock to say the least. Not sure what to say, how to feel, how to stop crying. I took a lot of pride in my job and thought I did it well. Since I have no children my job had become my identity really and now it is gone.

I'm numb. My mind is racing...wow.

Ethanol: Part II

2009-02-03T19:40:00.003-05:00

It's interesting that someone from the ethanol industry, I assume this since they choose to be anonymous, responded to my earlier post. I am interested being I monitor blogs for my work and we are in the process of figuring out a social media policy for when to respond. I would argue that I would have liked to know who is responding, so I can go an research the group.

I still disagree with ethanol being pushed on Americans. It is a a process that expends a lot of energy to create something that is less efficient and you can't argue, using farmland that used to grow other grains and crops to corn causing worldwide increases in prices of those crops including wheat.

I know it is a bridge to the next technology that we will use to replace oil, which is an imperative, but I don't believe it is the panacea that some are saying.

What America really needs a change of attitude. We need to make some difficult choices. And conservation is a must. We need to curb our usage of energy. We can't continue on the same path. Some of it is very simple, others will require a little more discipline. But the stakes are high. How can we not act?

Ethanol - what a joke! And other randomness

2009-02-01T14:09:00.004-05:00

Why the heck is America investing so much of its resources in ethanol? We are using land which used to produce food, which not only was feeding us, but people around the world, and now producing a crop that the government subsidizes almost exclusively and producing fuel that is inefficient and added to my car, actually causes me to get LESS gas mileage? Does this sound like a wave of the future? No, it sounds like a sham to me.

America, we are all about our creature comforts. We can still have them, we just need a new way of doing them. It's called innovation people. For so long, America has been the most innovative country in the world. Our technologies have been amazing. Why aren't we unleashing some of that innovation on one of the largest issues facing us. Energy independence that is clean, dependable and in sustainable means. That it's about thinking in a new way.

Look, Henry Ford came up with the Model T and the assembly line, changing America and the world FOREVER. People, that was 101 years ago - 1908. The technology really hasn't changed significantly.

This is a chance for America to change the world if we take the lead. There is a chance for businesses for make a lot of money. It's time for America to be smart again. If not, we're giving this up to other countries and you have to wonder, if America is in decline at that point. It's a battle for America to be great and this is the one we should be looking at. It is our chance to shape the world. Our chance to help countries that are developing and skip over our mistakes.

Ok, I'm getting off my soap box - for now.

Social Media Anonymous

2009-01-30T19:35:00.002-05:00

I have to admit it. I officially addicted to social media. You know all things on the Internet that connect people. Blogs, Facebook, reading twitter (I couldn't care less about actually tweeting), YouTube, you name it.

It's so fun finding people you haven't talked to in ages. I've recently started hanging around FaceBook. And I've found friends and relatives. It's really cool. And it doesn't take much time. I love my blog because it offers me space to really write.

And I keep track of social media at work to see how the company is mentioned so I feel pretty darn immursed in it.

Remember, the first step to fixing your addiction, admitting you have one. I have one, but I don't know if I want to fix it.

I'm mad as heck, don't know what to do about it

2009-01-28T22:19:00.003-05:00

Tonight I finished watching the last of the five-disk series Plant Earth filmed by the BBC. I know it is a few years old and originally ran on Discovery but this is he first time I really was able to watch it.

If you are in a cave, like I was, and haven't seen it, the series highlights fantastic areas around the world and the wildlife that inhabits the areas. I don't know if the 5th disk ever was shown on TV - it is three documentaries with experts about what is happening to the planet, how humans are effecting it and what can be done to conserve the wonders of the planet we have left. It sums everything up.

The more I watched it, the more angry I became. Angry because we are destroying so many parts of the planet. So many animals, insects and plants are going extinct. We are changing the environment we live in, potentially forever. And it is beautiful. I am sad to think I may never be able to see some of these natural wonders in my lifetime.

I am worried that so many of these things will be gone soon and I feel helpless. I am mad that so many people are apathetic about the place they live and that it is shifting, parts dying. That it's too difficult for them to recycle, they are put out, they are too busy. That big oil-fueled cars make sense, that it needs to be 76 degrees in the winter and 72 in the summer in houses.

I'm at a loss. Call me a tree-hugger. Go ahead. I'm ready to find my way to help. Maybe this is my calling. I may not have been called to be a parent, to be the smartest, to have the best job. Maybe this is what I need to do. I just know I can't sit back and watch. I don't have the option.

Brrrrr

2009-01-20T23:01:00.002-05:00

My thermometer says it's 48 outside with a gusty wind that makes it feel much colder. I know, most people in the country are dealing with much colder temperatures, but I am cold. It really reminds me that I really don't have many appropriate clothing to wear when it gets cold. I got rid of almost all of my sweaters because they were too large or just ugly. So I am down to 2 sweaters. I had to go and buy shoes that weren't as open. How silly.

I'm still cold. Where did I put those fluffy socks..?

Pooped

2009-01-14T22:17:00.002-05:00

Work has been busy. I have two co-workers out on maternity leave (2 out 8)and one of them has a big effect on my workload. My brain is kinda fried. And on top of it, is the project I'm working on for church. I get to give my first real presentation in front of a large crowd. Sure, Dad will be there too, but it's still unnerving.

I'm ready to curl up with my fluffy blanket (it's cold outside today in west Central Florida!)and sleep.

But, at least I am feeling challeneged like I haven't in a long time. I hope this will remind my boss why I need to stick around. In these economic conditions, you can't be too careful.

Holy Moly

2009-01-09T15:04:00.003-05:00

I've been working on a speech for a project at church off and on all week. I just sent it. I don't know how many times I have sat there with the arrow on the SEND button in the Outlook e-mail program and agonized about actually hitting it. This is one of the biggest writing projects I have been involved in and the most personal. I just want the team I am working with to like it. And that it has the impact we have set out to get. I have paced, drank espresso, and read it out loud again and again. I hit the button and it's gone so I can't take it back. But I have butterflies. Big ones. This is a proving ground for me. Holy moly.

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-25T12:44:00.003-05:00

We wanted to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! This week has brought us unexpected challenges, but it helped to remind us what this season is about, family, friends and an inner peace that is so important. So take some time out to reflect and enjoy the silence of the season.

From our home to yours Merry Christmas!

Baptism Times Two

2008-12-14T21:54:00.002-05:00

This weekend Abby and Chloe were baptized and we had the privilege to serve as Godparents. They looked lovely in their stunning white dresses Grandma Dawn made (yes I did type that) MADE. We had a great time.

Next up...time to deck the halls and I have Christmas cards to write. I can't wait for vacation to start on Friday!

Never Again!

2008-11-28T16:25:00.002-05:00

It is tradition. I go shopping with my Mom on Black Friday. We go early (7 a.m.) and are done by 11. Well, Mom is out of town visiting Karen, Joe and the twins so I was on my own. I slept in. Till 9. So I didn't get to JC Penny's until 10. First it took me circling the parking lot and then negotiating way too many people to look for gifts. And then the down escalator broke. I didn't even go into the mall because I think I was becoming claustrophobic and I had to get outside. On to the next shopping center. Wow. Too many people and crazy drivers. I made it through 3 more stores and I went home. I was successful in many ways but exhausted. I called Mom to tell her I would never do that again. Now I'm off to shop the saner way...the Internet!

I'm still alive

2008-11-25T23:24:00.002-05:00

I know. I have been neglecting my blogging duties. I just don't have much to say. I've been keeping busy, with weddings, visiting the twin nieces, a new position on an important committee at church that will take up more and more time, work and of course family and friends. I'm a little more reflective lately. Unsure where I am supposed to be going in life. Nothing seems to be turning out as I thought. Unsure. I don't feel this is the place to air my woes or inner most thoughts and feelings. Just observations and thoughts on occurrences I want to share.

Anyways. I hope everyone has a great Thanksgiving. I know I am blessed and have a lot to be thankful for.

Happy Election Day

2008-11-03T23:16:00.002-05:00

Please take the time to get out and vote on Tuesday. This is a right that people do not have around the world and this is something here in the U.S. that we beg and plead people to do so. This is the right our forefathers and mothers died for from the beginning when they risked all to gain independence from England to those who fought and died in wars around our planet. And yet we squander that right and it takes a charismatic man to get people to get off their butts to vote. I'm so disappointed when I hear people who are voting for only that reason. I hope these brand new voters understand how special this actually is and that they continue to vote through their lives. Because when you disengage and stop caring it becomes easier for those to take away those rights. As Thomas Jefferson said "We have counted the cost of this contest, and find nothing so dreadful as voluntary slavery." - Declaration of Causes and Necessity of Taking Up Arms (July 6, 1775)

I'm off my soapbox now.

Happy Halloween!

2008-10-31T19:45:00.002-04:00

I do have to say I really like Halloween. It's one of the few days that is just a meant as childhood fun. Kids get to dress-up and there's candy. Very simple.

Right now there are a nice bunch of kids out front of my door. Unfortunately it looks like we will run out of candy and my hubby is berating me for being "ill-prepared." See last year we had leftovers, Friday night brings them out I guess.

Who knew?

Anyways my ghouls and gobblins, have a great night.

Seeing Double

2008-10-24T21:17:00.002-04:00

Sister Karen sent this photo of Chloe (left) and Abby (right) during a quiet moment one morning this past week. Seeing this cracks me up because I found out last week that Karen and Joe have given sides of the bassinett to each girl. And the girls go in the same side each night. One of the nights I put Abby down for the night and Karen was suprised to find her there later. It's amazing, they have grown since we were there. So quickly.

Babies Time 2

2008-10-23T20:57:00.003-04:00

Last week hubby and I spent a great 8.5 days with my sister Karen, bro-in-law Joe and their daughters Abby and Chloe. Mini slide show is above, click on it to see larger photos. I found at the end of the week I hadn't taken many photos because I was spending the week living in the moment it seemed. Well, that's code for lots of hugs, rocking, feeding, burping and changing diapers. We were saying that my Mom was going through babies withdrawal. I can see where you can have that problem. You get used to holding someone in your arms, smelling baby and humming lullabies. A nice week.

Why Am I Watching? I Can't Turn Away!

2008-10-02T21:04:00.002-04:00

Earlier today it was all about Rays baseball. And then on to USF football and now, I can't believe I am saying this - I'm watching the vice presidential debate. I know, it's silly. But I keep imagining that there is a train wreck about to happen. Two of the most unfit politicians that could sit next in line to the president are duking it out live. You know there are You Tube clips in the making, along with the Daily Show and every other media outlet out there. And who really cares? It's two people debating what their running mates would do. Not what they will do because, really, what does the VP really do?

Side note - where does Palin get that accent? Is that people sound like in Alaska? I've never been there, but to me she sounds like she is from Wisconsin or some place around there.

But still, I can't look away. I want to, I want to turn it back to football...darn it, she said "darn right" again. It's sucking me in!

You Know When It's Time to Clean....

2008-09-26T13:31:00.001-04:00

This is a photo of my sister's TV. Last Sunday Dad saw how dusty it was and he couldn't help but write on it. Yes Laura, I did say this photo would show up some where. :-)

Scenes From My Early Birthday Celebration

2008-09-22T19:22:00.005-04:00

A birds-eye view of my cake

My sister obviously believe you go big (the candle) or you go home

Like my new bowling shoes??

Happy Almost Birthday to Me.

Tomorrow is my 34th birthday. Because the big day falls when others couldn't celebrate we did it early. Off we went to dinner with Dad, hubby and sister Laura and bro-in-law. And then we went off to the sister's pad for gifts, cake and bubbly

Before I save, I have to make a correction. I've been told that my Dad does not want to be called Gramps but prefers Grandpa. So I'm going to go back and switch it out from an earlier post. Wonder what he would think of Grampie or Grandpappie?

More Cow Bell!

2008-09-20T22:56:00.007-04:00

Rays Celebrate Making the Playoffs

Greg and Laura cuddle up during the game

Greg, Laura and Laszlo celebrate the Rays win!

So Laszlo, sister Laura and bro-in-law Greg and 36,000+ of our closest Tampa Bay residents had the privilege of watching the Tampa Bay Rays (by the way, they play in St. Petersburg ESPN) clinch a playoff spot for the first time in franchise history. As the guy in front of kept yelling, "Sept. 20, 2008, we are here watching history!"

We had a great day and I think I officially have a cow bell injury. If you don't know why a cow bell injury, fans of teams the Rays will be playing in the Trop., it is what you will be hearing a lot of soon.

Go Rays! and 9=8! (9 players, playing 9 innings can = 8 playoff berths)

An Office Romance

2008-09-14T14:24:00.001-04:00

Since there was nothing to watch on TV this summer we decided to rent TV shows and see if there was anything that was worth watching via DVD. I heard that The Office was pretty funny so we thought we'd give it a try. What could we lose? Most episodes are 20 minutes without commercials and if we didn't like it, we could just send it back. Now we've watched 4 seasons-worth and are excited for the new season to start next week. I think I might start watching TV only via DVD. No commercials, specials features including deleted scenes (which on The Office is as funny as the show) and other fun stuff. Screw regular TV. Except The Office and Heroes - the rest can bite me.

Oh Baby

2008-09-11T23:00:00.002-04:00

Dad, Mom and Abby

Dad and Abby

These two photos were stuck in cyberspace for some reason until today. So I thought I'd share. The newest news is that Abby's sister Chloe came home for the first time today. Keep Chloe in your prayers as she is still suffering from bradys (heart rate dips) so she came with a heart monitor. Doctors say this will be something she will most likely outgrow this and we pray this is right.

Niece Update

2008-09-08T22:50:00.005-04:00

Proud Grandma and Grandpa and Abby

Chloe in a Close-up

Late last week Abby was released from the hospital as she had grown to about 5.5 pounds. So immediately Grandma and Gramps made plans to visit. Grandma is staying in Jacksonville to help Mommy and Daddy out as they adjust to parenthood and with Chole still in the hospital, Abby would need someone to babysit while the new parents visited her sister.

Chloe is doing well and getting close to 5 pounds. She still is still having a few slowdowns of her heart but she is getting better every day. Soon she will join her sister at home.

A Tale of a TV Stand

2008-09-05T22:15:00.001-04:00

So we received a new TV a few months back. Unfortunately it didn't fit in the TV stand we currently have. So we had to find something to put the TV stand on. We went everywhere. Target, Best Buy, three or four furniture stores and everywhere in between. Nothing but overly expensive, poorly constructed pressed wood chip. And when we thought we would just go to Target and buy something cheap to hold us over for a few years, we couldn't even do that. They were constantly out of the only one that we liked or it was damaged. We got so mad, we just left.

Next thing I know I am searching the web and the next thing you know we are ordering a nice piece of furniture for a great price, no tax and free shipping. I mean I am great ordering all kinds of things from the web. But a piece of furniture that I couldn't touch? I surprised myself and I was surprised that it is great. Laszlo was mentioning how really cool the Internet can be. That it brought us together with a furniture company in California and a short time later, it's in your house. Awesome.

You Should NEVER Bet Me

2008-09-02T18:33:00.003-04:00

Try JibJab Sendables® eCards today!

Ok, this is the last one, I promise. But last night, my brother-in-law Greg said there would be NO way to get his noggin into a jib-jab cartoon, he claimed it is too big. Well, as you can see, Greg on the left, fit just fine, along with bro-in-law Joe and my hubby Laszlo. Greg, I think you just wanted a cartoon with you in it and that's OK and your wish has been granted.

By Popular Demand

2008-08-31T13:53:00.004-04:00

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Word got around that I made a JibJab cartoon of my sister Laura, to help cheer her up since the Olympics have ended. If you don't know, she is an Olympics nut, I expect her to have a countdown clock on her blog showing how long till the Winter Olympics 2 years from now. So everyone enjoy, and Laura, the Olympics will be here again before you know it. In the mean time, get some sleep.

Too Much Time on My Hands

2008-08-29T17:45:00.002-04:00

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Ok, I couldn't help myself Mom and Dad. Computers are way too much fun.

Politics - The Fun Way

2008-08-29T14:58:00.004-04:00

I was reminded why I love the Daily Show so much when I caught a repeat of last nights show this afternoon. This video about Barack Obama is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. I can't wait till next week and the Republican Convention. Stuff like this makes the upcoming election tolerable.

On a side note, I watched Sarah Palin introduced as McCain's running mate. I'm confused but at the same time intrigued. I mean, I am happy that a women is on a ticket. Confused that he chose someone with so little experience and from such a small population center. I wonder if some of the die-hard Hillary supporters will now want to vote for the ticket with the women. Either McCain is really brilliant, or he just made a terrible mistake.

They Line Up and Take Aim?

2008-08-28T20:52:00.003-04:00

Opening the National Hurricane Center's web site can give one pause. There are storms and potential storms all over the place. Every time I look, it seems like there's another. First Gustav, then Hanna and the three other systems that could very well become Ike, Josephine and/or Kyle. Makes me not want to look any more.

Right now thinking about Gustav leaves a pit in my stomach. Where ever this storm goes, destruction will follow and I only wish something miraculous would happen and it would disapate. I only hope everyone on the Gulf Coast takes this seriously. Whew, storm season and can't end soon enough.

Introducing..

2008-08-23T17:26:00.009-04:00

Abby

Chloe

Our newest members of the family: Abigail and Chloe. They were born Monday in the early evening. Mom and Dad braved T.S. Faye and an evening and morning of power outages to see the new additions. Both are doing well and just need to gain some weight before they can go home. I'm sure we'll get up there sooner than later, just need to make sure that we don't overwhelm the new parents since there will be a parade of guests.

Jumping for Gold??

2008-08-22T19:22:00.003-04:00

Watching the Olympics every now and then I find a sport that I had no idea was in the Olympics or why it's there. My sister talked about race walking (most people might think of this as exercise). And then there's now BMX (are the Olympics taking items from the X-games now?). Finally, Olympic trampolining.

Is this sport really for gymnists that couldn't tumble on the ground? How is this an Olympic sport? What's next? Olympic kick-ball? Olympic skipping? When does the maddness stop?

Welcome Babies

2008-08-19T21:11:00.002-04:00

So my sister beat me to the punch in announcing the births of my two nieces yesterday evening. All the particulars are over on the World According to the K_C's blog.

But I wanted to congratulate my baby sister Karen and her husband Joe as they welcomed Abigail and Chloe yesterday in the 5 p.m. hour in Jacksonville. Both are in good shape, as my sister said "they just need to fatten up so we can take them home." We don't have any pictures yet, but we hope to have them towards the end of the week as Joe has been living at the hospital with Karen and the babies.

Congrats - love Aunt Sarah and Uncle Laszlo - the favorite aunt and uncle.

Storm Watching Makes Me Almost Ill

2008-08-17T09:37:00.003-04:00

Tropical Storm Faye is out there churning just south of Cuba now and the forecasters are telling us that it may be setting its sights on the West coast of Florida. You think that you would get used to it, but you don't. The nerves from not knowing what is going to happen. And I kind of think it is worse that I have to be at work because you are leaving your home and love ones behind. And hoping that you come home to an intact place.

So its on to make those preparations that in case Faye decides to pay us a call, we'll be ready as we can. But I do keep hoping it will sputter and fall apart - but I doubt that will happen.

Noteable

2008-08-06T19:13:00.002-04:00

There's something about little note cards. I have the hardest time not buying them, especially when they are on sale. Like today in Hallmark. There they were, boxes of cute note cards, all 75% off! Thank you cards, cards with little champagne flutes, lacy cards, modern ones and little pastel ones. I only bought one box, but I did have the hardest time saying no to more. And it's not that I don't have other note cards, I have boxes of them.

My little addiction. Note cards.

Dog Days of Summer

2008-08-02T11:36:00.002-04:00

Whew, it's hot out there! Well, and wet. In Central Florida we've had our share of rain in the past few week.s It rains in the morning, the afternoon and in the evenings, heck even over night. I can't complain. We went through summers where the rain was sparse. In Florida it is supposed to rain in the summer.

Downside? Weeds. I can't pull them fast enough. They are growing in hyper speed. And the grass, whew, it's ready to be cut five days after it was cut last.

But that's OK. I'm happy to see the water pour from the sky. I'm one who likes to open the blinds and sit on the couch and watch the rain. Something fascinating about it.

Snotty, Scratchy and Tired

2008-07-24T22:56:00.003-04:00

I felt pretty good by the end of the work day. I had accomplished a lot. I spent most of the day updating a web site. Not hard, just lots of clicking an typing.

But as the night has wore on, I think I am getting a cold. My nose is running (and I think we are out of tissues!) I have a scratchy throat and I am pooped.

Sucks.

I have lots of stuff I want to write about here - but my brain is having trouble putting together simple thoughts. So I give up, I'm off to find a glass of OJ and then sink into bed.

Night.

Tea for Two and Two for Tea..

2008-07-21T21:49:00.004-04:00

This past weekend the family spent in Jacksonville celebrating Karen and Joe's twins by throwing a shower. Chef-sister Laura and I decided to do the girliest thing we could think of, throw an afternoon tea. The tea was complete with tea sandwiches and cookies, a minature tea set on a lemon cake and flowers everywhere. We had a great time. Karen even received a piggy bank with a tiara and tutu from her mother-in-law (a hit of the party).

Then Sunday we spent helping them organize the nursery, putting away a tidlewave of clothing, blankets, bibs, booties and other baby-related items.

Laura and I gave them a Flip Mino so they can take videos of the twins and share with family and friends. Or Karen can start vlogging (creating video blog entries) on her blog Twin Envy. Or

Joe can become a new star on YouTube. Many possibilities.

So I'm kinda tired. And I have a pile of laundry and a dirty house that should be cleaned. I'll get to it one of these days, just not today.

Another Weekend Ends

2008-06-29T21:28:00.002-04:00

Weekends go by way too fast.

One day you are walking out of the office feeling great - a weekend is upon you. The next, you are working hard on your yard and watching a movie in the evening.

The next it's Sunday, you're at church, eating dinner with your parents and enjoying some fantastic homemade lemon/lime Cello and now it's 9:30 at night.

Wow. It's like a whirlwind. At least it's a short week with the holiday parked at the end.

Sigh - time goes way too fast.

Playing Catchup

2008-06-25T21:50:00.005-04:00

Thought I'd play a little catch-up here. We've had a busy pair of weeks. We had the very cute and pregnant sister and brother-in-law in town for Father's Day. Below is a picture of the two dad's cracking up at a golf story. There's always something funny that comes out of their golfing excursions.
Then it was off to Jacksonville to attend Karen's first baby shower. Below is the Classic Pooh stuffed animal I gave her. He is soooo soft and cuddly. I would formally like to apologize to my family because I was high on estrogen from that wonderful time of the month and I was off the chart annoying - I'm annoyed at myself at how much so I was. Sorry.

By the end, we were a bunch of tired people. Laszlo took the time before we set off for home to take a nap. That char in their living room does kinda just suck you in.

Then it was back to work.

I had the cool chance to do some media training this week. It's hard. I give all the props to people who are comfortable in front of the camera. I realize my brain and mouth don't always work together. And that I really need a hair cut!

Anyways. Now it's on to working on pulling off Karen's second shower. I've never brought a party to another city. But, it should be fun. We are having a tea party - Tea for Two. Something so girlie about a tea party, it takes you back to being a little girl. I'm psyched.

Miscellaneous Catching Ups

2008-06-06T17:57:00.003-04:00

I have a little catching up to do. Last week was kinda crazy - not the kind of short week you'd expect after a long holiday weekend. The two photos above are some of the leftovers from that weekend. First Karen and Joe, we spend a lovely evening doing the most primitive and simple thing, burning things in a fire pit while drinking beer (well - all but Karen). Why Joe's not smiling more, I don't know.

Then Monday we went hiking at the Theodore Roosevelt Recreation Area on I do believe the last nice weather day Florida will get. Today it was 96 in Tampa, tied the heat record for this date.

But back to the past two weeks. On Wednesday morning my colleagues and I found out that our boss had "resigned" the night before. So we were thrust into the whys, what the *&^@? and what's next? And the next week and some we have been going through the grief process. Started off with shock and then it was back and forth with acceptance and anger. And by the time I get home, I just don't want to look at my computer.

BUT then my little sister is showing me up. She started a blog now, Twin Envy, where she is starting to chronicle this new chapter of her life, being pregnant and what her life will be once the twins come. She's blogged I think three or four times this week! But, in all fairness, she really has much more to talk about than I. My days are really all very similar and I can't imagine anyone wanting to read about my life on most days.

So anyways. I am happy the weekend is here. Relaxing sounds really nice. Now, off to find a cold beverage of the alcoholic variety.

Fort Caroline..Bum Bum Bum..And Other Ramblings

2008-05-24T15:31:00.005-04:00

Happy Memorial Day weekend from Jacksonville. We want to thank all the men and women serving our country here and abroad. We are able to enjoy this weekend and freedom because of you and those who have come before you.

Today Karen was working so we thought we would spend the day seeing some sites where a woman pregnant with twins might not want to walk around. So we started out at Kathryn Abbey Hanna park. Where we took a few minutes to look at the Atlantic and step in some sand before we took to the "wellness" trail. Well, we weren't sure we were ever going to find out way out. We walked and walked and walked some more. We started to think we were going in circles. But we finally found our way out.

Then down the road we went to Ft. Caroline (bum bum bum), which is interesting. It is a "good guess" of what it might have been. No one really knows. Laszlo found himself in a recreation of a hut the native Americans lived in and then Joe and Laszlo were looking out over the water.

Overall a good day so far. It's always good to be able to get away, even if it's only a few hours away.

Now, I'm thinking a cold beer would hit the spot...mmmm Beer!

Karen Update

2008-05-10T17:14:00.003-04:00

Here's the most recent picture I have of sister Karen's expanding belly. We are visiting them over the upcoming weekend so we'll have more after this.

A Photo Backlog

2008-04-14T18:28:00.002-04:00

Random photos from the past 2 weeks.

Two Sunday's ago the family spent the day at the Honda Grand Prix of St. Petersburg. From the picture above, bro-in-laws Joe and Greg, Hubby, sister Karen (can you see the beginnings of her twins baby bump?) and Mom.
Here's Joe playing a video game that had him sitting in a race car - he was the only one who could fit and he barely did at that.

One of the many race cars on the track on the streets of St. Pete.

The historic Columbia Restaurant last night. My Aunt Anne and Uncle Ted, parents and sister Laura and Greg all had the please to have a meal at the Ybor City landmark. mmmmmm! We even got a tour of the place by our waiter. The kitchen is huuggee!

Millennium Park - Part Deux

2008-03-29T23:42:00.003-04:00

So we decided to head out to a park today. Nice weather, good company. Sister Laura and Bro-in-law Greg came along this time. We thought we would take them to Millennium Park in Seminole since it is by there apartment and they had never been there. We had lots of fun. As you can see above my hubby found a coconut - on the banks of the inter coastal waterway. He thought it would be cool if he peeled it (as he is doing above) and crack the sucker open. He did. Unfortunately my battery on the camera went dead so I couldn't catch the outcome - an open coconut that was bad - tasting that is. But he had a lot of fun doing it. We figured it was good to know that if we were stuck on a desert island Laszlo could get into a coconut as long as he had his keys on him.

This is a picture of Laura and Greg. Yes, Greg has an Aerobee on his. He thought we might play with it at the park. He got tired of carrying it so he started wearing it. Could he be starting a trend?

This was very sad. Millennium Park had these really cool sculptures along its boardwalk. I had taken a picture of this one about this time last year. Unfortunately some jerks decided it was up to them to destroy them. This one they broke the head off and almost all of her fingers. Another was completely shattered. It was sickening.

This was some really cool trees on the nature trail we took. It looked like there was a fire in the area. Fires are common in Florida. We have a fierce dry season. I thought they were very sculptural. It was the trail that we couldn't figure out which way to go on. We were hoping we'd come out eventually. We did and made it to my parents for a lovely dinner.

My sister has requested we ride on the Pinellas Trail as our next park visit. I'm in for that. I have to get my husband to make a path to the bikes as they are behind all kinds of stuff in the garage.

Laura, Greg and Laszlo - It's on - Like Donkey Kong!!

From Darkness to Light

2008-03-23T11:26:00.002-04:00

Last night my husband, sister and brother-in-law attended the Easter Vigil Mass at our parish St. Matthew in Largo. Easter vigil is the most sacred mass of the year. It is the first mass of Easter where we celebrate Christ rising from the dead.

It is deep in tradition. As the photo shows we start outside (this year we were under and overhang because it was raining off and on) with a fire which signified the light of Christ. This light is then passed candle by candle through the crowd. We then process into the dark church illuminating it. Readings from the old and new testament are read, music is sung and finally the lights come up and we sing the Gloria. Following is one of the best parts - the baptisms of those coming into the church ending with their first communion and confirmation.

I know it's a long mass - more than two hours. But I always say it is worth it. It is the encapsulation of what we as Catholics are about. An Easter people, a people of the word, with up to nine readings packed in (it's up to the pastor on the number of readings), a sacramental people and a people of the light. I always say that every Catholic should attend this mass at least one time. Granted it's not the best place for young kids, it is a place for anyone wanting to witness deep traditions that use your senses well - from sight and sound to the smells of incense permenting the space and even taste as there's often cake to celebrate with the newly initiated.

So Happy Easter to all. Alleluia, Alleluia.

I Love the Wind

2008-03-19T21:57:00.003-04:00

We've been having the strangest weather lately. The late winter and spring are typically very dry here in Florida. And while we often have breezy conditions because I live close to the beach, it isn't often windy. Recently we've had a series of fronts come through that have started and/or ended with lots of wind.

There's something that I love about the wind. I love coming home and opening wide the windows. I love the the way the curtains billow as the wind flows through them. I love sitting on my love seat by the front window and feeling the wind on my face. I love the smell of wind.

I have heard lots of ladies complaining about bad hair days recently. But I could care less. Because all I want to do fling open my windows or sit outside and enjoy this fabulous weather. I know that soon it will be hot and humid and I'll be shut tightly behind my windows and cooled by a machine rather than God.

As Seen on My Commute

2008-03-06T18:29:00.003-05:00

I was behind an SUV that proclaimed "Born and raised a bitch" and "Drive it like you stole it."

Now I'm not too sure why you would feel the need to put either one of those things on your car. These are really things you want people to read about?

I just don't get it.

I have never understood liking being called a bitch. I'd rather go with strong, smart, sure of herself as positive words/phrases. Men don't get a label like that when they are successful. I see the word bitch as a negative word. Plus - ever heard of road rage?

And Drive it like you stole it? Um...you just want the police to hassle you?

Just something else that is random but bizarre in my world.

March - whhaa?

2008-03-03T18:54:00.002-05:00

How can it already be March? I just can't believe how time flies. It just seems like days just roll into the others. One minute it's 8 a.m. and I am wondering will I EVER be at work right on time when my boss is in? and the next it's time for bed. I wish I could savor more moments. I am seeing how fleeting life can be. Rather than thinking about how to get to a next big moment.

Just a random thought. Pretty heavy for a Monday I know. But it's all I've got.

Whew - what a week

2008-03-01T18:51:00.002-05:00

What a blur. That's how I would categorize my week.
Sunday, we had a health scare with my Dad. We thought he might have had a heart attack. Thank God, he didn't. He had a really bad cold and because he didn't eat and drink enough so his electrolytes got out of whack, causing his blood pressure to drop and him to pass out. The moral of the story? Drink when sick, just drink in general. My sister suggested the new family motto should be "Just drink!" And I said that the family coat arms would have that motto across it with four different kinds of glasses, a wine glass, a beer mug, a water bottle and sister Karen suggested a glass of milk since she is pregnant and is drinking milk by the gallon.

Then there was a jaunt to Orlando for a meeting. And then to Tampa for a different meeting. And in between, lots of work at work which also included my yearly evaluation that I wasn't prepared to do.

By the time I got to today, I just wanted to sleep and then sit on the couch in my pajamas watching cable.

And now? I am watching the bonus features on the Veggie Tales Top 10 Silly songs with Larry. Now I have admitted it out loud. I like the Veggie Tales. I don't have children, but I think they are the funniest thing. And now, I have sucked my hubby into them. What's not to like about singing cucumbers, tomatoes, asparagus, peas, squash and other various veggies?

Man, what a random post.

So Shiny and New..and Pink!

2008-02-20T20:02:00.003-05:00

So I must be the last person I know practically who was iPodless. I had thought of getting one before..and it just didn't happen.

Until Valentines Day. My sweet Hubby bought me a lovely new pink iPod Nano. Yes PINK. I think that makes it even better. I've officially put some music on it and found out where we can buy music - you know Amazon is cheaper than iTunes? And their specials on entire albums can be pretty good.

So yes, now the only person I know who DOESN'T have an iPod? My Hubby. And now he wants one too, just not pink... Maybe if he's really, really good...

Breaking News - Part Deux

2008-02-15T17:24:00.002-05:00

Previously I wrote about my sister's pregnancy. Here's the update - there's going to be TWINS! So I'll be an aunt times 2.

Congrats sis and bro and law. I'm sure they will give Dave Simanoff's nephew Ryland a run for his money for the cutest baby ever.

Breaking News..(cue music)

2008-02-10T20:23:00.000-05:00

I'd like to congratulate my baby sister and bro-in law Karen and Joe. They announced they are having a baby in September (which is a good month for a birth if I may say so myself).

We are very excited for them and are looking forward to welcoming him or her.

Maybe one day he/she will have a cousin...

Yo ho..oh you know the rest..

2008-01-30T20:39:00.000-05:00

Saturday I attended my first Gasparilla parade. It was interesting to say the least. Hundreds of thousands of people, most of them drunk, some stoned and almost all festooned with beads.

Really, the main reason I went was because my parents received tickets for one of the corporate tents that line the parade route. These tents offer many cool things, including food and drink, private port-a-potties, seating and the best chocolate chunk cookies I've had in a long while. Being that I live across the Bay from the festivities, the parking, traffic and the crowds on the parade route, don't tug at me to come. I'm happy to stay at home and catch some of the highligts on the TV.

I still can't say I understand the allure of the day. A bunch on grown men and women, dressing up in pirate garb, throwning beads and getting drunk? I don't know - maybe I'm a fuddy-duddy.

But I did have fun. Mainly the people watching. And did I mention those chocolate-chunk cookies? I don't know if I'd make the pirate-fest in Tampa a tradition, but I'd say try it at least once. Now what the heck does a person DO with all those beads?

Blah, blah, blah

2008-01-21T21:59:00.000-05:00

I haven't had much to say recently. I was sick with a BAADDD cold last week and the last thing I wanted to do was type. I mainly lay in bed in a half coma-like state because of the great drugs I popped throughout the day. And on top of that, my hands have been really sore. I have a new symptom that I take seriously, the shooting pains in my thumb and pointer. I understand that's carpel tunnel. So I have been cutting down on the typing when I can. So blogging will take a side to the health of my hands, because it I can't type - I don't know what I'd do for work...seriously, and that is sad!

The Internet Rocks

2008-01-07T18:04:00.000-05:00

The Internet is really cool. And I was reminded of it yesterday when I received an e-mail from a friend I hadn't talked to in a long time. While all the cool information s neat - the connectivity it offers is what keeps me coming back.

On a random note - I saw a zebra-striped golf cart with pink seats ad an air-brushed smile on the front driving home tonight. I have to wonder what would suggest to anyone to do that? But at the same time - it was in Pinellas Park - and that say everything.

Happy New Year!

2008-01-06T15:58:00.000-05:00

Wow - I can't believe it's 2008. But you know, I am ready for a new year. It seems that I needed the clean slate that comes with the new year. I'm excited at the prospects for the new year.

Although being back to work with a regular schedule isn't one of the exciting things. I was getting used to working partial weeks and shorter hours and there's not a holiday in sight. Oh well - it is called work for a reason I guess.

I know that every one talks about getting organized in a new year. Well, we are actually doing it. We tackled the problem closet in December and have started on the biggest cluster #$@! in the house - the garage. Oh - it will be complete before summer. I look forward to walking into the garage and knowing where to find the thing I am looking for.

Any way. Happy New Years to my friends and family. I am hoping your year is prosperous, happy and full of wonderful memories. You only get to do this year one time, why not make the most of it?

A Little Craziness for the Holidays

2007-12-25T12:25:00.001-05:00

So we woke up this morning with the power out. Not the thing you want to find when you need to put the Christmas roast in the oven in a short time for Christmas brunch. But, luckily the good guys at the power company fixed it and the lights were back on.

I wanted to share some pictures from last night - hubby and my official 2007 Christmas photo didn't come out. BUT, there were photos that DID come out. Drum roll please!

Karen and Joe putting on the dog...well or as we called it, Disco Christmas - alluding to Karen's shirt - Joe even coordinated.

Mom and Dad. Looking dapper and lovely as always. Seriously - Dad looks the same in almost every picture - he's got the photo smile always ready to pull out of the back pocket.

Greg here is excited because we are about to sit down for dinner. mmmm...ham! Now remember the comment about Dad above? Greg has the same thing - kinda. This is one of the more natural smiles for him. Maybe it's the ham. See the photo at the end - I could have photoshopped the head?

This is Laura showing her wacky side during opening of presents. This is a common expression too. If you recall me mentioning that in an earlier post. Pretty funny.

This is Dad opening a lovely set of wrenches from Karen and Joe. I know - every guy can do their best Tim the Toolman Taylor impersonation.

This is the lovely self-portrait Karen took Christmas Eve before dinner. This is how she looks BEFORE all the makeup and hair -- see prior photo.

Laura and Greg at church. Yes - Laura does wear something besides jeans and a t-shirt. To be nice - we were lucky she was there - she had a taxing work day and we are happy she made it.

Finally - here's Laszlo with his Christmas Eve dinner. As you can tell he wasn't ecstatic to be getting his photo taken - his dinner was getting cold.

Anyways. Once again...Merry Christmas all and to all a good night. Unfortunately my vacation has come to an end..so my blog vacation has officially ended.

On to 2008 - Can't believe next year is next week.